The great philosopher R. Kelly once said, “I’m a flirt.” 🙂 I hope y’all are lighthearted enough to know I’m kidding. haha. No, R. Kelly is not a philosopher, BUT he did say, “I’m a flirt.”
We’re all flirts, don’t you think? No?
Let me shed a little light.
The kind of flirting I am referring to, is flirting with sin. Some of you already might be thinking, “oh here she goes again,” or “nah that’s not me.” But….Yes it is, it’s human nature.
I’m going to cut right to the chase and tell you that so many of us flirt with sin and think it doesn’t affect us. I have heard it all before. I’m guilty of it.
“Yeah, we don’t actually have sex, we just do other stuff.”
“We only do it sometimes.”
“Well I know I love them and I’m going to marry him/her, so God won’t mind if we have sex.”
“It makes my thoughts become impure, but it’s just a TV show, right?”
“Yeah this song is trashy, but it’s just a song, it’s not like I’m actually doing it.”
We literally like to see “how far we can go,” before it actually becomes a sin. Or we do something small, like tell a little white lie, and think God’s commands don’t apply to us since it was nothing major.
The question we should be asking ourselves is why we keep making excuses and living unrighteous lives if we claim to have a relationship with Christ? Why do we think just because we love them, it’s permission to have sex? Is God a liar? (Yikessss) Why are we so entertained by trash and excuse it by saying, “well it’s not like I’m actually doing it.” Don’t you realize that once your mind is there, your body soon follows? You’ll be starting off small and then next thing you know, things are completely out of control.
What ONE very important word do these four scriptures have in common?
1 Corinthians 6:18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.
1 Corinthians 10:14 Therefore, my dear friends, flee from idolatry.
1 Timothy 6:11 But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance, and gentleness.
2 Timothy 2:2 Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.
Didn’t get it? Too lazy to read them all? Well, I’ve got you.
The very important word they all have in common is the word Flee.
You see, God didn’t tell us to face temptation and “be strong.” He didn’t say “well if you don’t go all the way, it’s okay.” He literally told us to RUN. FLEE. You know why? Because He knows our flesh is so weak. As humans, our fleshly beings are so, so weak. We think we can fight it by ourselves, we think we can overcome it, but for some reason, we just fall right back into the same patterns. He never told us to wait it out and fight. He said run. The best way to “fight” temptation is to RUN AWAY.
To be blunt, you keep sinning and not getting it right, because you aren’t taking the actions to get it right. You’re not getting it right because you don’t want to get it right. You’re not setting yourself up for success. You’re too afraid. You’re too comfortable with your sin. You’re not taking God seriously. Sin separates us from Him. (Isaiah 59:2) If you wanted help, you’d go get it.
I know somebody is probably mad at this point and will stop reading, but I’m going to keep on, because “tickled ears do not guarantee salvation.” It’s not about what you want to hear. I know that these “unpopular” messages need to be said. So to continue…
Matthew 5:29 says, “If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.”
So what is this saying? No, I don’t think God is saying to pluck your eyeball out if you keep watching something you’re not supposed to. But I think He is saying that you need to do what you have to do in order to avoid that sin. This applies to everything. If you can’t stop watching porn, literally get some internet restrictions that block certain sites. If you and your boyfriend keep having sex, set boundaries. What do you think is going to happen if he stays over your house, or comes over late at night and no one is there to keep you two accountable? You guys play dumb as if what I’m saying is not true or real. YOU NEED TO BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF. Stop making excuses. Make him leave at 8pm if you have to. Make your best friend call you at 8pm to make sure he’s leaving on time. Better yet, meet in public places or with groups.
You don’t have to be laid up in your house alone to get to know each other or enjoy each others company. I don’t care how long you’ve been together. Heck, go to your parents’ house if you need to!!!!! Keep people in your life that will hold you to a higher standard and keep you accountable. If none of that is working, it may be time to break up and get yourselves together, because obviously you guys are battling something much deeper. No matter how you sugar coat it, sex before marriage is wrong. There’s nothing else to it.
If certain friends cause you to change your behavior, drink, smoke, or whatever else, you need to cut that off. That boy you like keeps texting you on the late side, talking about “come over?” RUN. He said “Neflix and Chill?” … RUN back to your house, watch Netflix and chill by yourself. Your friends said come to a party, there will be alcohol? RUN. His/her text messages make you feel some type of way? BLOCK and RUN. I literally wear my purity ring everywhere as a reminder to honor God with my body. I’ve had guys ask me what my ring meant and when I told them, I never heard from them again. OH WELL. BYE, FELICIA!!
Literally, whatever causes you to stumble, you need to run away from it. Don’t make little excuses and think you can just have one drink, if you know that one drink leads to many other drinks. Don’t think you can go over his house and just “make-out” when you know that makes you want to do more and touch more. Don’t think you can just “lay up” in the dark with just you two, if you know you start to get touchy feely at that time of night.
I’m about to get real, because this article ain’t for little kids or the clueless. This is for the mature and the honest. Ladies, you know how it is!! You find out you might be seeing him alone, so you purposely put on your GOOD underwear, the matching ones, “just in case.” Then you got the nerve to put on skin tight leggings, you know the ones that make ya booty pop? Yeah those. Or the skimpiest twerk-worthy shorts you can find. YALL AINT FOOLING NOBODY! Be honest. hahaha. Even though you “want to be pure,” your mind is ALREADY THERE. You’ve already set yourself up to FAIL. Y’all can sit there and act like what I’m isn’t true if you want to! I already know what’s up and I’m about to go deeper, y’all still with me?
Ladies, y’all will literally tempt y’alls man and be touching and kissing all on him, then expect to be able to stop. You’re teasing and flirting with sin. Not to mention, you’re causing your MAN to stumble and flirt with it too!!! How many times have you actually stopped? C’mon, please be real. You know what your issue is. Don’t you love your man enough not to tempt him? Don’t you care about his walk with Christ enough? Better yet, don’t you love GOD enough?? I speak to the ladies because I’m a lady and that’s what I know, but fellas this goes for you too. Fellas if she keeps kissing all on your neck or rubbing up against you and YOU KNOW that makes your mind do flips and turns, RUN FORREST RUN!!! She keep biting on your lip? STIFF ARM HER AND RUN. She ain’t worth it. Nothing is EVER that good.
I’m being funny, but in all seriousness, whatever you need to do to stop sinning, no matter how silly it seems, do it. If you care about your relationship with Christ, do it.
If you care about your soul, heck ………if you care about your PARTNERS soul, DO IT. Stop flirting with sin.
Sin is NEVER satisfied. It always wants more. THAT is why you keep falling back into the same patterns. THAT is why God said to run instead.
We keep making excuses for why we aren’t totally living for Christ. I guarantee it’ll be hard. I guarantee you’ll lose some friends, because your standards no longer encourage their lifestyle. I guarantee you’ll be heartbroken if you have to break up with someone. But I also guarantee you’ll get through it with God. It won’t be what’s considered “cool,” but who’s opinion really matters? God’s or some human’s? I can also guarantee it’ll be worth it. Eternity in Heaven is worth it. That little bit of pleasure with your boyfriend is not worth your soul. That drug addiction is not worth your soul.
Jesus paid the price for all our sin, so that means you don’t have to do it anymore. He loved us THAT much!!! At any time, you can stop and turn away from it and He’ll be waiting for you with open arms. Why not get it right while you still have the chance? His love and grace is everlasting.
Please hear me when I say, this was not a judgment article. That is not my place. In fact, most of it, I spoke from experience. I’ve been there. Even though you may be a stranger to me, I am willing to be honest about that. Think about me what you will, but I know the way to reach people is through honesty and transparency. So yeah, I’ve sinned. I’ve messed up a thousand times. I know what sin can and will do to you. But I am forgiven. Please know that you can be too.
This was an “I love you” article. I swear I love you. My heart was so heavy even writing it thinking about all the friends and family I have that refuse to get right with Christ. My heart cries out for you! I tried to lighten it up with jokes, but the truth remains. We need Jesus Christ. I was so hurt thinking about the ones who think just because they do it “sometimes,” makes it okay. The Bible says we cannot serve two masters. (Matthew 6:24) You are either totally for Him or against Him. I must be honest with you and say there is no in between! But the amazing part about this is, God wants you! No matter where you’ve been or what you’ve done, I PROMISE God wants you. You don’t need to have anything together before you come to Him. Come as you are. He will do the fixing and mending. And if you’re already saved, but know you haven’t been living right, it is NEVER the wrong time to get it right.
If you felt sad while reading this (not my intention) or convicted and like you needed to get it together, that’s actually a really good sign. God is calling you back. I’m saying all this because I literally love you. If it were possible, I’d want to see everybody by my side in heaven. And if little old me loves you, imagine how much more Jesus loves you?
Y’all know Valentine’s Day is coming up. So next time ANY sin comes knocking at your door, do like you do when a telemarketer calls and be like, “Nah fam…..I’m good.”
Stay encouraged. I love you guys.